Road bump, or the circumstance of being human

I’m in São Luis but I didn’t want to be here. For the first time during this trip I want to be far away from where I am. This gigantic and sunny "Bairro Alto", reminding me of those summer days in Lisboa, cannot prevent my craving to be elsewhere. This stopover was planned but ended up being a forced one, larger than expected, when my body decided to surrender and my mind followed suit. I’m questioning myself, almost giving up, living a moment of weakness, human and natural. If only I could stop for a day, take the boat to the other side and head South... But on the other side there is no Cacilhas, there’s an Alcântara which is not the same, and there no road or train will take me home. I stop at ‘Antigamente' instead, from where I write these words. I look at those who pass by, strangers to my questions and problems, while thinking about what to do... Passers-by carry on with their lives the same way I should carry on with mine, heading to a destination other than this one, following my dream, given that other dreams are impossible and giving up would be plain stupid!
I’ll move on, not knowing how or why, but I will do it! I will not give up that easily of a dream my instinct compels me to follow and luck allows me to bring to reality each day. Following my dream is harder than predicted, more profound than I planned for, bolder than what I dreamed it would be, but way too important to end-up like this. Bigger reasons would make me give up, maybe they will come my way. Without those, giving up would be forfeiting life and that’s not who I am. I’ll move on instead, there’s a bigger path in front of me waiting to be explored...

São Luis, Brazil, February 2009